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elegy

by Legs Akimbo

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1.
You thought you were happy But we didn’t know what that meant No one worked harder To get through the day or stave off the end I don’t know what I’m doing But I’m calmer than I’ve ever been Stripped down to nothing reduced to my roots books, records, and friends When somethings wrong You fix it You can’t just keep carrying on Strange that sometimes strong means quitting The thought that still hurts me Is somebody else with the dog they'll never love her the way that I did The way that I do I hope that she bites them But mostly i hope she forgets The sound of my footsteps The smell of my skin The same goes for you When somethings wrong You fix it You can’t just keep carrying on Strange that sometimes strong means quitting
2.
Walking out the door Past Campbell’s corner store And its morning The sun is coming out For hard workers and layabouts No more heavy weather warnings I go to jump the turnstyle Full of all the things I told you Save two dollars 90 cents That’s half a cold brew I still don’t know I still don’t know How lost I was It doesn’t matter anymore The smell after the rain Is exactly the same As it was in high school I remember asking Jordan To go out to the movies She smiled so widely And im 30 now I can’t eat so fast without heartburn But im patient and I care about stuff Walking by a group of teenagers Who are laughing loudly Performatively Wishing it was me instead Like I don’t already have it All I need is in my head And my light is lit I still don’t know I still don’t know How lost I was It doesn’t matter anymore

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released April 18, 2024

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